Conversation 046 – Accepting and living within one’s limitations

This is an enigmatic conversation and a somewhat poignant one, involving a software coolie as a protagonist (Mr.Y).

You are free to interpret it in your own way.

Mr.X: I know you are looking for a job very badly. Emailed you one lead for a position as lead software architect in a reputed company. Did you check?                                          

Mr.Y: Saw it da…I don’t think I will fit in that position at this point of time… that’s why I left it like that casually and also I didn’t inform you L. Don’t know why my mind set have changed not to work in these kind of full time positions even though I have the necessary skillset and experience… Don’t know why…probably the frustration has crept me deep inside over the years… the mind set unable to take in all the nonsense going on the corporates over the years and still try to remain normal and neutral … like you.. Probably my mental condition is not handling it, the effect of experiences in all the companies once I crossed 7 to 8 years of my experience…

Mr.Y: And the reasons for quitting in all of them since then…Plus the domestic environment also not very conducive and motivating enough. Plus the layoff and the underemployment over the last 3.5 years…there is just no break to recover…I didn’t want to say all these to you as a reply to your email, but when you asked now, I thought I have to give a satisfactory reply. You know my position more than anyone else since my college days…

Mr.Y: I felt if one has proven limitations it’s better to accept it and live within it and not further aggravate oneself and other’s interests. If there are understanding people around you and there are alternative source of income, it’s okay to take risks…to avoid further harm, but not otherwise.

Mr.Y: I am just trying my best to earn within my limitations a limited income, just enough to support me and the people around me…that itself is a time bomb for the past several years…With instances of layoff for senior positions at the drop of a hat, I am not in a position to take that sort of risk, while undergoing unnecessary undue unfriendly ungrateful employers at this point of time.

Mr.X: I am just reading what you have mentioned and I was in a meeting at the time…

Mr.Y: I could understand that…I was just typing my thoughts… otherwise it will not come other sometime. Leave this and take care of the meeting….These things can be talked more F2F to take decisions but in this world, even close brothers don’t have much time to talk…                               

Mr.Y: There are many things you are taking it to yourself just like me or anyone else. No one else but the individual can deal with it. Both of us have problems of similar nature…yours is explicit because of direct nature but mine is apparent because everything is subtle…you can’t say which is more damaging…              

Mr.Y: The conclusion is both of us have to lead superficial lives. The “other” person has escaped the commitments and is unbound, but no one knows what is going on his mind. Events happening around has just left me emotionless and reactionless to it. People only tends to look at outside (including parents) and no one can understand anything beyond that. It’s the same thing when we deal with others as well. That’s why I am not able to live a life of pretence and that’s not acceptable anywhere. You have to be deceptive and manipulative in corporate world in order to pursue the profession…but I have been unable to…just like monkey trying to jump over random branches around 15 times so far…

Mr.X: Okay, see you. Will call some time.                                                                                                             

Do you think the conversation sounds as pessimistic as it looks…or is it the harsh reality/general trend for professionals with 15+ experience in the IT industry…please share your views.

P.S: Mr.X is a very highly optimistic personality, risen to the ranks of a senior software architect by sheer grit and hard work, now working in a highly reputed organization, though he does not possess any professional qualifications (engineering degree).

Author: Rajini

"Knowledge is the ultimate perfection of self-realization.". (Srimad Bhagavatham 3.26.2) Trying to seek that knowledge through life experiences that leads to compassion, dispassion and ultimately satisfaction.

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